Friday, October 19, 2007

This Aussie dies ...

So this Aussie dies and goes up to Heaven. At the Pearly gates St Peter apologises and says,
“There is a backlog and it might take ages to get you into Heaven. However if you agree to take and pass a short IQ test we can fast track you straight in”
“OK, Mate,” says the Aussie
St Peter says, “You have to answer 3 questions. There is no time limit but we have to accept your first answer”
“OK, Mate,” says the Aussie
St Peter says, “Question 1 is How many days start with the letter ‘T’?
Question 2 is how many seconds are there in a year?
Question 3 is our special Australian one – Who is named in the song Waltzing Matilda?
Do you understand?
“OK, Mate,” says the Aussie
St Peter says “Come back and see me when you are ready to answer”
“OK, Mate,” says the Aussie
And 5 minutes later he is back.
Are you sure you are ready as I can only accept your first answer?” asks St Peter.
“OK, Mate,” says the Aussie
St Peter says, “Question 1 is How many days start with the letter ‘T’? What is your answer?”
“Two” says the Aussie.
“Correct” says St Peter. “It does not count but do you know what they are?”
“Today and Tomorrow” says the Aussie.
St Peter winces then says, “Question 2 is how many seconds are there in a year? What is your answer?”
“12 Mate” says the Aussie
“Oh dear that is not the answer” says St Peter “How did you arrive at that answer?”
“2nd of January, 2nd of February 2nd of March and so on. 12 months equals 12 seconds” says the Aussie.
“That is not what we wanted but I suppose I’ll have to accept” says St Peter. “Now finally Question 3 was our special Australian one – Who is named in the song Waltzing Matilda? What is your answer?”
The Aussie says, “That was a tricky one Mate but I reckon the answer is Andy”
“Oh dear, that is not the name we have in our song” says St Peter. “Where did you get ‘Andy from?”
The Aussie says “ Just sing the song with me Mate.

Andy sat
Andy watched
Andy waited till his billy boiled …………….”

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